If 2014 was the year I began my recovery journey, then 2015 will most certainly be the year I started to put into practice some of the skills I’d learnt, in the real world… and arguably this is where the true recovery battle began!
2015 has come with it’s ups and downs, with great sadness and loss but also a whole lot of love and support of my family and a friends who I feel even closer to. It’s been such a jumble of a year. But I truly believe that the greatest feelings of loss come from the most wonderful parts of life. I’ve learnt that you really can’t experience the good without connecting to the difficult parts and for that I am so thankful and grateful that I have been able to experience the whole technicolour package of emotions.
I completed my inpatient stay in May and began the transition back to living independently, something that has taken a lot of hard work and use of those damn skills! I wasn’t sure I believed it prior to discharge, but the work really did begin when I was back in the real world. Of course all the amazing skills, support and therapy I had received set me up to be able to manage it, but I think I hadn’t anticipated how tricky putting everything I had been taught into practice would be! It’s been a real process of trial and error and at times I lose sight of the progress I have made but I’m getting there! I’m proud to be back at work (loving it!) and being involved in all sorts of new projects, back at Uni (which is going well I think) and I’ve even got back into Church and joined the choir. Life seems fuller of the things that are important, perhaps taking some the of the space my illness was using up. I’ve still got a way to go but hopefully I am on the right track!
I’ve come up with some alternative New Year’s Resolutions this year, to try and move away from the common ideas of losing weight or creating a new you, and hopefully they will help me to embrace the person I already am and live my life to the max where possible!
- To listen to more new music each week- I’m really in to Northern Folk at the moment but any new music is good. There’s so much out there to explore!
- To cut myself some more slack and practice using the good enough principle in my day to day life- I think we are all too harsh on ourselves. Life isn’t perfect and I’m going to try and use my compassionate mind skills to remember that it’s ok to be good enough
- To read something each day and enjoy more good books
- To spend less time on my phone and laptop
- To write more for myself and not always for others- practice some writing every day
- To relearn how to sight read music and practice singing more often
- To manage my money better- saving, sticking to a budget and having one no-spend month
- To complete my degree
- To make an effort to unwind more and look after my wellbeing (mindfullnes, colouring, meditation)
- Do something nice for me once a week
- Do some voluntary work
- Get a promotion or pay rise at work
- Meet some guys, go on a few dates… challenge my anxiety around dating!
- Travel to at least one new place
- Drink more water
- Make time to be more creating- art journaling, photography
- Do more yoga- at least three times a week
- Dance it out in my room more often
- Reconnect with friends I’ve lost touch with
- Dip my toes in a sea you’ve never been to before
- Give blood
- Be able to run 5k and run a charity 5k
- Write a 5 year plan
- Work on beating my ED a bit harder
- Spend more time outdoors
- Go on more adventures
- Keep a journal
- Create an online portfolio
- Join something new- a society, club or organisation
- Get back into horseriding
Next year is the start of the next chapter of the book… I will be a whole
quarter of a century and I am quite excited to see what the next year will bring. Thank you to everyone who has supported me, been there for me and been part of my 2015 journey. I wish you all a very happy, healthy, successful and fun 2016. It really is so lovely to be celebrating at home this year rather than in hospital like last year! What a year it has been! Happy New Year Everyone!